Somatics in space

As the Artemis II crew prepares to board the Orion spacecraft today, the world focuses on heat shields and lunar trajectories. But inside the crew cabin, a different kind of preparation is underway: functionally integrating the final frontier.

NASA officially announced that the Feldenkrais Method will be the primary movement modality for this and future missions. While most people think space travel is about "The Right Stuff," we know it’s actually about “The Right Paradoxical Vacuum Breath" because in space, a paradox is the only thing that actually carries weight.

The practice of somatics in space introduces challenges not found in any earthbound approach to expanding bodily consciousness. For instance, in a traditional Feldenkrais class, you start by lying on a mat and sensing your contact with the floor. In a spacecraft, this initial ATM step presents a slight . . . technical hurdle.

To address this and other crucial extraterrestrial embodiment issues, the recently formed Inner Space Somatic Specialists Outer Space Steering Committee (ISSSOSSC - pronounced 'I-so-sick') issued the official NASA Guide to Awareness Through Movement (ATM) at 17,500 MPH. This groundbreaking, planet-departing document includes the following Zero-G Scan and Test Movement Protocol:

1. Find a Neutral Position
   Tether yourself to a storage locker so you don’t drift into the CO2 scrubbers.
2. Sense Your Contact with the Surface
   You will immediately notice that you have no contact with the surface. In fact, you have no "down." Since traditional “grounding” techniques necessarily fail, deploy the newly developed “atmospheric anchoring” technique.
3. The "Ghost" Floor
   Try to imagine the floor is there. Spend 10 minutes sensing the pressure of the floor against your heels. Note that your heels are currently 4 feet away from the nearest bulkhead. Should you at any time feel "grounded," please contact Mission Control immediately, as you may be experiencing a localized gravity leak.
4. Identify the Gap
   Notice the space between your lower back and the mat. In microgravity, this "gap" is technically infinite. You may allow your awareness to expand into this vacuum, but be careful not to let your ego expand to match it — the Orion capsule is small.
5. Roll Your Head
   Slowly turn your head from left to right. Observe how, without gravity to provide a fulcrum, your entire body begins to rotate in the opposite direction, like a slow-motion rotisserie chicken.

While the intention of experiencing "effortless movement" may be easier outside of the Earth’s gravitational field, the ISSSOSSC warned Artemis crew members about several potential hazards of orbital somatics, aka practicing ATM in a vacuum:

• The Infinite Scan
  Without the resistance of the ground, students often report "sensing their breath" extending all the way to the Moon. While beautiful and cosmic, the resulting awe could, in all likelihood, distract astronauts from vital mission tasks, such as initiating docking maneuvers or steering the spacecraft.
• Proprioceptive Misperception
  If instructions tell you to "lengthen your arm," proceed with the utmost caution lest you accidentally push off a control panel and inadvertently de-orbit the craft while seeking a better self-image. While drifting into the atmosphere would be an out-of-this-world example of non-doing, it is strongly discouraged by Flight Command.
• Moving from 6 to 12 in Space
  Without a floor to tilt against, a pelvic tilt becomes a full-body somersault. NASA engineers have requested that astronauts refrain from doing "The Clock" unless they are wearing a five-point harness to avoid hitting the ceiling.
• Moving from 3 to 9 in Space
  Do not, under any circumstances, engage in this maneuver because such lateral yaw could potentially interfere with the ship’s gyroscope.
• Eye Movement Alert
  Moving the eyes toward the horizon is discouraged, as the horizon is currently a curve moving at several kilometers per second, which may lead to extreme vestibular 'disintegration,' dizziness, and projectile vomiting. NASA reminds astronauts that while the view is out of this world, their lunch should remain in their bellies.

Usually, at the end of an ATM lesson, you take time to "stand and walk." In space, you are in danger of experiencing what has been identified as the "float and gloat" effect instead.

NASA’s main concern is the crew’s skeletons becoming 'excessively organized,' leading to a stellar level of grace that makes the ground crew feel inadequate and clunky by comparison.

As we watch Orion lift off from the newly renamed Trump Launch Complex 39B today, let’s remember: human evolution won't stop on Earth. We are taking mindful awareness to the stars. We may not have a floor to support us, but we have the entire universe to move through — as long as we don't accidentally kick the "Abort" button during a particularly deep inhale.

News Flash
The ISSSOSSC issued the following urgent, last-minute pre-flight memorandum today regarding TRE (Traumatic Release Exercises):

While NASA encourages stress relief, it strictly forbids the practice of neurogenic tremors in microgravity. During initial simulations, the involuntary shaking induced by this practice produced a "human pinball" effect, causing astronauts to bounce violently off cabin walls at high speeds. Furthermore, it is unacceptable to have the crew vibrating at a frequency that could match the ship’s resonance; it’s bad for the upholstery, potentially dangerous for the flight computers, and even worse for structural integrity.

The lift-off photo at the top of today's blog post comes from SpaceX. I found it on pexels.com.

Oh yes, one more note, lest I forget: Happy April Fools' Day!